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Sarah’s List

Age 41. Female. Straight.
Photo by Frederick Shaw
Hookup Lists is a weekly chronicle of the highlights (and lowlights) from one person’s actual hookup history.

Age 12

The Sixth Grade Romantic

‍First kiss. A Blues Brothers dance at the JCC. He gave me a Presidents of the United States of America CD for Valentine’s Day. No tongue. No sparks. But my diary entry was basically fireworks.

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Age 16

The Camp Crush

‍We were both counselors at Jewish summer camp. Lean, aloof, smelled like sunscreen and Marlboros. I was obsessed. He came out four years later, which honestly just confirmed his hotness.

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Age 21

The Awkward First Time

Childhood friend turned “first time”. I confessed my virginity. He said, “We should fix that.” We did. It was awkward and oddly bureaucratic.

Age 22

The Internet Cafe Find

I met him at an internet café in Thailand. On our second night shagging, I bit his shoulder. He ghosted. My sexual experimentation phase lasted exactly one nibble.

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Age 26

The Almost Forever

‍We moved in together. He was open to converting for me. After a year and a half, we outgrew each other in slow motion. We broke up when he left for grad school and I was so relieved. 

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Age 27

The Clumsy Writer

‍A journalist that spilled wine all over himself on our first date. It was a setup. I told him I wasn’t looking for anything serious. He said he only did serious. Fifteen years, two kids, and one mortgage later, he was right.

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Disclaimer: All names and identifiable details have been modified to protect the reputations of our contributors in the eyes of their partners, colleagues, and parents.
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